


Someone Will Love You (Let Me Go)

by cosmicpeachcloud



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Broken Nielwoon, M/M, Some angst, Sungwoon and his two boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 14:59:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16221491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmicpeachcloud/pseuds/cosmicpeachcloud
Summary: “Daniel, I’m- We broke up.” Sungwoon clarified which was strange because Daniel had been the one to initiate it.Daniel laughed sourly. “Yeah, I know. We’re just friends.”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Hailee Steinfeld & Florida Georgia Line- Let Me Go

 

Another morning of rain was just how Sungwoon felt. The entire month had been littered in showers for the rainy season so much so that Sungwoon started to believe it was his fault.

 

Some days were easier. He could roll out of bed in under five minutes and make himself a filling breakfast. Other days the weight of his futilely bandaged heart pressed his chest heavily into the bed and he would just barely make it to class on time.

 

Today was one of those days.

 

The curtain was closed over his window leaving his room even darker than it was outside. Sungwoon turned over onto his side and wrapped his thick brown blanket higher over his face.

There were days when his disposition improved throughout the day. Seeing his friends, goofing off in class or the cafeteria, having a beer in the middle of the day. But there were days when he felt he was being dragged through the mud only to be picked up and dropped again.

 

Sure. Everyone had those days but not Sungwoon. He was a ray of sunshine on a cold winter day; a shady cloud when the sun was unrelenting.

 

Today was day 34 and Sungwoon was not himself.

 

It’s not like he didn’t try to revert to normal. Every morning was a new attempt at bouncing back and restoring his liveliness. It was just that some days he was so lost the fight ended before it began.

 

There was noise outside his room. Jisung making coffee probably. They were roommates in the upperclassmen suites with private bedrooms. The privacy had been nice… when Sungwoon needed it. The quietness of his room was just another reminder of what was now missing.

 

The door opened and only Jisung’s head popped in. “Wakey wakey, baby!” Sungwoon’s personal ray of sunshine in his gloominess came in the form of his best friend. Sometimes Sungwoon would rest his head on Jisung’s shoulder and the older would know exactly what he was saying. If there was anyone Sungwoon was most grateful for it was Jisung. “I made you,” Jisung slid his hand through the crack of the door and wiggled a plate at Sungwoon. “A sandwich! But you have to come out here.” Sungwoon stared at the food, cuddled within his safety zone and then back at Jisung. He opened his mouth to give an excuse but Jisung was already on it. “No. Nope. Out here or I’ll eat it. You have 2 minutes.”

 

Sungwoon watched the door close and yawned. He was warm, but he was hungry.

 

“One minute!”

 

He threw the blanket off himself and hopped outside on his tiptoes.

 

“I’ve got you well trained.” Jisung smirked holding out the plate for Sungwoon to take.

 

“Shut up. Give me orange juice while you’re at it, wife.”

 

Jisung gasped. “You are so disrespectful. Give me that back.” Sungwoon hunched his back as Jisung hovered over him making grabbing motions. It was times like these when Sungwoon’s heart didn’t feel unloved. Jisung smacked the back of his head with a warning to take the umbrella and have a good day.

 

Good days for Sungwoon were a dime in a dozen these days. Even if he started out well enough and willing, it wouldn’t last long. Even when he was having a bad day, things went even worse.

 

Currently jogging through the drizzle of rain was Sungwoon’s personification of misery. The reason for his broken heart. Irony hidden in the fact that Kang Daniel was once Sungwoon’s embodiment of happiness, love and adoration.

 

“Hyung!”

 

Sungwoon wanted to avoid him, but another part yearned to still be deemed relevant enough to him. His heart was sputtering, like a car slowly pulling over after popping a tire. He was in need of some fixing.

 

“Hyung, hey.” Daniel grinned softly in his red hoodie and light blue jeans. Sungwoon smiled weakly. “I need your, like, opinion. Advice?” Daniel ran a hand through his bouncy hair and chuckled to himself. It was his giddy chuckle. The one that came out when he was nervous but excited. The laugh he used when he first asked Sungwoon out. Hope began to bloom in Sungwoon’s abdomen.

 

He should have known better.

 

“I need a good restaurant recommendation. Different to the ones, you know, we went to.” Daniel rubbed his neck bashfully and grinned at the ground.

 

Sungwoon’s gaze flitted around him. He never kept his eyes on Daniel for too long in fear that he would never be able to look away. “Um,” he said as his eyes jumped from the words on Daniel’s hoodie to the tree behind him to his sneakers. He picked a place off the top of his head, the next place he had wanted to go with Daniel. “There’s a Thai place in Mapo-gu. Why are you asking?”

 

Daniel clasped his hands together and smiled brightly. It hurt Sungwoon’s eyes. “You have good taste in food, hyung!”

 

_That’s not what I meant._

 

“Oh. Yeah, sure.” Sungwoon swallowed the excess saliva in his mouth making a loud gulping sound.

 

“And what about the dress code? Is it fancy? You know how I dress, hyung.” Daniel commented playfully. Yes, Sungwoon knew. He knew everything about Daniel.

 

Sungwoon adjusted the strap of his bookbag. “It’s normal. Nothing fancy. You’re going on a date or something?” Finally, Sungwoon allowed himself to take a crack at a joke, but at the cost of his own heart.

 

The blush creeped up from Daniel’s neck until the apples of his cheeks were glowing and he was holding back a smile.

 

“Kind of.” Daniel’s buck teeth popped out sinking into his bottom lip. “A guy in my class…”

 

Sungwoon stared at him and the rest of the world around them turned gray. His pulse was pounding in his temples, too fast for the rest of his cognitive senses to catch up.

 

“I just want to do something nice. Try something new, you know? If he says yes.”

 

Sungwoon caught the words nice, he and yes. He blinked to calm the dizzy spell he felt coming on but only seemed to make it worse.

 

“So yeah. I just wanted your opinion, hyung. Since you know me best.”

 

Daniel’s tone was grateful as well as unaware and Sungwoon was helpless.

 

“Y-yeah. Glad to help.” Sungwoon’s chuckle came out more as a choked breath watching Daniel thank him and walk away.

 

One can not remain friends with their ex. At least not immediately following the break up. Sungwoon had learned this the hard way. Daniel had said the words “I want to still be friends” and Sungwoon, like the masochistic idiot he was, did not hesitate to agree. Granted, he was nursing a brutally severed heart, so it was possible he was not in his best mind.

 

It had been four weeks since they broke up and two weeks since they started talking to each other again. Daniel was seeing other people. There was someone else occupying his mind.

 

Sungwoon’s hands trembled as he typed a short message to Jisung asking to meet somewhere. He really hoped he was back in their suite. He ached for the solidarity of his home. When his phone vibrated, he pivoted in the direction of the dorms and broke into a sprint.

 

Jisung was sitting in the common area when Sungwoon busted in like a madman. “Whoa. Did you just run a marathon? What’s up, buttercup? Why the sudden text?”

 

Sungwoon’s chest puffed in and out rapidly trying to decrease the crazy beating of his heart. His vision was clouded in black spots. “I was with Daniel.” He said, voice surprisingly calm.

 

“Oh?” Jisung’s eyes widened and he immediately sat up, locking his phone and placing it on the couch cushion giving Sungwoon his full attention. “How did it go?” He prodded soothingly like a therapist helping a patient.

 

Sungwoon took a few breaths to answer. His solemn eyes met the floor a few times before he focused on Jisung’s plaid shirt.

 

“Hyung,” He licked his lips and felt his throat dry up. “He asked me for advice about another guy.” Jisung breathed out a sympathetic sigh and Sungwoon slapped his long sleeve covered hands over his eyes. “Don’t! Don’t do that.” He pleaded in distress, scrunching his eyes beneath his hands. Feeling Jisung’s lingering pitiful stare broke him, the tears bursting out and raining down his face. Drop by drop like the beginnings of a heavy storm. He couldn’t contain his sniffles that soon turned into hiccups. Jisung ran to him, wrapping his arms around him tightly.

 

Every emotion Sungwoon had tried to bury, every thought, every question that tainted his conviction came rushing back to him, ripping off each band aid Sungwoon had used to patch himself up. How could it be so easy for Daniel to move on when it was so difficult for Sungwoon to even wake up in the morning without the sight of the man he loved. When he felt that it was even hard to breathe without him. This was the trouble in loving someone more than they loved you. How would he ever move on?

 

Minutes passed with Jisung coaxing the tears out until Sungwoon decided to come to his senses. He took one deep breath and swallowed the rest of his sobs. Pulling away, Sungwoon wiped his nose with the back of his hand and avoided eye contact.

 

“Thank you.” He said curtly and wandered to the refrigerator for a drink of water. He could feel Jisung’s weary stare but sipped from the water bottle hoping the older would say no more about his embarrassing emotional relapse.

 

“Let’s go out tonight.”

 

Sungwoon pulled the bottle away from his lips enough to angle his roommate with a blank but questioning gaze.

 

“Let’s go out.” He repeated. “Go to a bar or something. Have some fun, get into some trouble! You get a piercing and I’ll get a tattoo on my ass. It’s foolproof!”

 

Sungwoon snorted. “Foolproof.” That’s exactly how he felt. A fool. He thought the idea over, though. Maybe no piercings but a night out could take his mind off things if only for a little while. “Okay.” He agreed. His eyes felt disgustingly puffy.

 

“Alright! I knew you would say yes, you party animal. I wasn’t going to let you say no anyway so put on a face mask and get pretty. Tonight, we dance!”

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

“I’m just going to get another drink. Don’t worry, I’ll be okay. Really!”

 

A good friend is capable of reading and understanding your true emotions regardless if they’re on display or being concealed. A true friend sees all of that and gives you space anyway. Sungwoon knew Jisung had an eye on him as he pushed through the crowd, not believing that he was fully okay.

 

And he was right. Sungwoon had believed- had _wanted_ to be okay but heartbreak was unfortunately not healed with booming music and neon lights.

 

He slipped onto a vacant stool at the bar and tried not to look as pathetic as he felt. When the crowd died down he received his drink, sipping at it slowly to prolong his time away from the grinding adults on the dance floor. His eyes were roaming over the multiple bottles of liquor behind the bartender when he felt a presence beside him.

 

“You look like you need a pick me up.”

 

Sungwoon swirled the ice in his cup and turned to the voice. The curiosity that had began to build within him increased at the sight of the man’s face. He was handsome. Reading him through his eyes, Sungwoon detected no source of malice nor ulterior motive. Ironically, that made him sad. If Sungwoon wanted a one night stand this was not the guy.

 

“Really?” Sungwoon replied with a tinge of sarcasm coloring his voice. “What told you that?”

 

The guy smiled slowly, crinkling his eyes with the motion and a flare of life flickered within Sungwoon.

 

“I bet you don’t know we share a class.”

 

Sungwoon wrinkled his lips and shook his head slightly. Jet black hair, approximately 6-foot, Prince-like features- where had this guy been hiding?

 

With a short chuckle, Sungwoon’s classmate took the stool next to him and ordered a Coke. “I’m Minhyun.”

 

“Sungwoon.”

 

“It’s nice to meet you, Sungwoon.” Minhyun grinned at him and it was contagious so for the first time that night, a real smile, although small, appeared on Sungwoon’s face. “If you don’t mind me asking, what has you so forlorn looking at a nightclub?”

 

“Well,” Now Sungwoon wondered if he should give the short version or tell a complete lie to avoid the subject. He drank in an ice cube and let it sit on his tongue as Minhyun waited patiently for his answer. “Love, I guess.”

 

Minhyun breathed out a sigh and tapped his fingertips against his cup. “You’re seeing someone then?”

 

Sungwoon furrowed his brows briefly and then relaxed them. “No. Not anymore.”

 

It was silent between them for a second with Sungwoon mentally cursing himself for ruining the conversation.

 

“That’s good for me then.”

 

Taking a glance to his right, Sungwoon’s stomach tickled. Minhyun was coyly smiling at him.

 

“Have you eaten yet? How about a quick late dinner?”

 

Sungwoon was taken by Minhyun’s forwardness but he was not put off by it either. There was something in his gut saying go for it.

 

“I usually don’t go out with strangers. No matter how friendly they are.” Sungwoon half-joked putting another charming smile on Minhyun’s face.

 

“Okay, how about this? Hi, it’s nice to meet you. My name is Hwang Minhyun. We study at the same university and have the same GenEd class. I’d like to take you out. Would you like to accompany me to dinner?”

 

Sungwoon took back what he said about Minhyun being harmless. This tall man was smooth and confident; everything Sungwoon was weak to. There was a kindness that radiated from him however and the lethal combination sparked another flame within him. It reminded him that he was still alive and that all the ache he was carrying just might be lifted from his heart.

 

Looking directly into Minhyun’s eyes, Sungwoon decided it was time for him to heal.

 

“Okay.” He said feeling oddly timid. “I’ll have dinner with you.”

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

It only took a few more dates for Minhyun to win Sungwoon over. Quiet walks at night, movie dates, and food runs. Minhyun was the perfect gentleman; never overstepping boundaries or rushing Sungwoon into anything. They accompanied one another throughout the day and sat together in the one class they shared. Always someone to lift Sungwoon’s spirit, and Sungwoon was relieved.

 

“No, definitely not. The first one is the best movie.”

 

“What?! You obviously didn’t understand the hidden meanings behind those scenes.” Minhyun’s eyes turned a tad judgmental as he side-eyed his older companion. “It’s pretty apparent that you didn’t read the books…”

 

Sungwoon was offended. “How can you say that?” He gasped. “Of course I read all the- whoa!” Sungwoon tripped forward, the tip of his shoe snagging on the high sidewalk and clung to Minhyun’s bicep. He looked down to find his shoelaces sprawled all over the pavement and immediately Minhyun was on one knee reaching for Sungwoon’s foot, tying the laces before he could.

 

“Be more careful, hyung.” He said protectively and Sungwoon’s heart wavered at the command.

 

“Hey, I can do it myself.” Sungwoon complained but there was a reluctant smile adorning his face.

 

Minhyun glanced upwards, still in his kneeling position, and smiled charmingly. “But you have me to do it for you.”

 

Sungwoon smiled wholeheartedly then and let Minhyun sling an arm around his shoulders as they continued their walk.

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

Seeing someone happy without you always triggered a bout of hidden emotions. Sentiments you weren’t aware of until that beautiful smile was aimed at someone else.

 

“Okay so everyone brought a date and didn’t tell me? That’s great. I love it.”

 

Minhyun leaned down into Sungwoon’s ear. “I’m going to tell Jinyoung to come.” Sungwoon nodded eagerly, glancing sneakily at Daehwi who was sulking by the gate.

 

Every month there was an outdoor movie screening and s’mores to kick off the night. For the university students it was a date night of sorts. An open invitation to bring a friend or a special someone. Sungwoon had tossed the idea towards Minhyun after a bit of self reluctance. He was still getting used to breaking old habits he had with Daniel and this movie night was one of them. He didn’t necessarily feel bad or wish he was with the young dancer though. It was just another new but positive step forward.

 

“Oh look who showed up!”

 

At the announcement, everyone’s heads turned towards Daniel who was hand in hand with Ong Seongwoo. Sungwoon eyed the thinner guy casually and wrapped his arms around himself. Minhyun dropped his hands onto Sungwoon’s shoulders and steered him towards the blankets strewn on the grass.

 

“Let’s take this distraction and get a good seat! Jinyoung is on his way. Tell Daehwi to sit with us.”

 

The best part of the evening was seeing the panic in Daehwi’s eyes when Jinyoung popped up next to him. The parental gazes of amusement that Sungwoon and Minhyun pointed at him when Jinyoung wasn’t looking.

 

Somewhere along the movie, Minhyun kicked his legs out and leaned back on his left hand, said hand which was placed around Sungwoon’s back. Sungwoon glanced up at him playfully suspicious and Minhyun peered down at him, eyes softly scanning his features before scrunching his fox like face into a teasing smile. The happy full toothed smile that escaped Sungwoon did not go unnoticed.

 

Eventually Sungwoon had casually settled into Minhyun’s side, fully relaxing as the movie played on. Close to the climax of the movie, there were a few eager pokes to his left thigh. He rolled his head over to Daehwi who continued to prod him and raised his eyebrows.

 

“Come closer!” The younger boy whispered and Sungwoon brought his ear to the freshman’s mouth.

 

“I don’t want to be a mood killer but… there are a pair of eyes watching you.”

 

Sungwoon’s brows furrowed. “What?”

 

“Um,” Daehwi subtly looked around and then pointed his finger into his right shoulder.

 

Sungwoon turned his head and surprisingly he did catch sight of someone averting their eyes. It made his heart beat in interest but he decided to ignore it and tuck himself back into Minhyun’s shoulder. He wouldn’t read into it.

 

He shouldn’t.

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

Sungwoon was a love song kind of guy. Most genres but ballads, especially. Not overly saturated in cuteness but rather those lyrics drenched in raw emotion. Poetic words that were relatable. Sitting outside the campus café in his black shirt and pink hoodie, Sungwoon mindlessly sang to himself. Mumbling through the English lyrics to a Charlie Puth song about lost loves and broken communication.

 

“Oh hey hyung. Good morning!”

 

_The irony._

 

Sungwoon looked directly up into the sun, squinting his eyes until they focused and he was able to make out the smiling face of one Kang Daniel.

 

“Hey.” He replied simply and the wind rustled his hair.

 

“Long time no see, hyung. Have you been busy?” Daniel took it upon himself to sit down on the bench next to Sungwoon. Now Sungwoon was positive they’d seen each other around lately, but it was a matter of who’s company they held. Even their breakup didn’t stop Daniel from bounding up to Sungwoon but the one thing that did was Minhyun.

 

“Ah, you know, the usual.”

 

Daniel took in every minimal word that left Sungwoon’s mouth, puppy dog eyes heavy on his face.

 

“Yeah, I know.” Daniel rubbed at the back of his neck. “Do you want to get a coffee or someth-”

 

“They didn’t have your muffin today,” Minhyun interrupted unknowingly. “So I got you this pastry instead.”

 

Sungwoon attempted to smother the sudden awkwardness by offering his thanks to Minhyun and taking his breakfast. He thought it best to just ignore what he knew Daniel was going to ask. (Why was he even going to ask that?) He stood from the bench, almost jumping up, not wanting to be sandwiched between both men. He gestured for Minhyun to sit instead which he did with a greeting towards the younger.

 

“Hey Daniel.”

 

“Hello Minhyun hyung.” Daniel rubbed his palms against his jean clad thighs and pressed his lips together.

 

“This is really good! Good choice.” Sungwoon said, biting into his raspberry pastry. His small smile had both men gazing at him fondly. “What did you get? Let me try it.”

 

This was aimed towards Minhyun of course which put Daniel in his place. He subtly nodded his head to himself and stood with an awkward smile. “I’m off to class. See you guys later.”

 

Sungwoon slid into the vacant spot and made sure to sit close to Minhyun. He had an urge to comfort the younger although he’d done nothing wrong.

 

“So what did you get?” He repeated, eyeing the bread in Minhyun’s grasp. Minhyun looked down at him as if he were trying to read the situation without actually asking. Sungwoon tilted his face upwards and opened his mouth. “Ah.”

 

Minhyun stared for a second longer and raised the bread to his lips, letting him take the first bite. “You’re cute when you’re hungry.”

 

“Am I not cute all the time in your eyes?” Sungwoon retorted sarcastically, easily because everything was easy with Minhyun.

 

“That you are.”

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

When Sungwoon posted a picture of himself with Minhyun on Instagram it came with more attention than he would have liked. The comments were filled with hoots and hollers from their friends; wink emojis and awws, ‘ _cute couple alert’_ and the comment that seemed to peak everyone’s interest _‘just date already’_.

 

To the uninformed outsider, Sungwoon and Minhyun were dating. They were always together, caught sending cute smiles to each other, it was obvious. But to those who knew Sungwoon, they knew he was still mending his sore heart and they weren’t dating. Only those who followed Sungwoon on Instagram had access to that one eye opening comment.

 

Therefore, when Daniel started to be seen less and less with Ong Seongwoo it wasn’t a coincidence.

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

“Hyungs! How’s it going?” Daniel clambered over to Jisung and Sungwoon, skateboard in hand and biceps on display. “I was wondering if you guys could help me with my theory class. I figured you guys already took it so.”

 

The dining hall was at its busiest hour with loud and hungry students parading about. Jisung knocked his fist against the table. “You’re asking the wrong guy. That class was difficult even for me,” He chucked his thumb at Sungwoon. “But Sungwoon was pretty decent at it.”

 

Daniel turned his attention to the small hyung like an obedient puppy. Sungwoon was too aware of the glint in his eye, having dedicated so much time being with the younger that he could dissect every ulterior motive.

 

Sungwoon was weary.

 

After the outdoor movie event, he had caught Daniel watching him a few more times. Never did Daniel hold his gaze or send a wave in his direction, quite the contrary actually. He would avert his eyes and pretend he hadn’t been staring. Sungwoon gave him no more than a wrinkle of his eyebrow and continued with what he was doing. Ironically, he usually was with Minhyun when he caught the majority of his ex’s stares. It was odd and Sungwoon wasn’t an idiot.

 

“Uh, what is it that you need help with?” He asked, his fingers opening and closing around the phone in his grasp.

 

“Ear training! It’s really kicking my ass. I can identify a few notes but besides that…” The younger shrugged his shoulders with a grimace.

 

Sungwoon took a second to think about it. He didn’t want to ruin all of his progress but saying no would make him look like a jerk. On the other hand, he didn’t owe anyone a thing, _especially_ not Daniel. “Uh, I’m not sure if I have enough time, Daniel.”

 

“Aw, hyung! I won’t take up too much of your time. I promise!” That damn kicked puppy expression.

 

Sungwoon subtly tapped Jisung’s knee seeking his silent advice. Jisung patted his hand twice and gave an obscure nod. He bit his bottom lip to suppress a long sigh and also nodded at Daniel.

 

“Alright. I’ll help you.”

 

“Really?” Daniel cheered. “Thanks, hyung! Are you free later today?”

 

It was a slippery slope, and Sungwoon found himself gliding into familiar territory. Jisung had advised that it would be good for him. A way to help him fully get over Daniel by facing his heartbreak head on. Besides, it was just some simple lessons in scales.

 

At least for Sungwoon it was.

 

With the pretense of studying, it became a weekly thing for Daniel to go to Sungwoon with an assignment or a request to tutor him. Sungwoon was reluctant at first and asked Jisung to accompany him every time Daniel requested his assistance but soon the younger caught on and Jisung regrettably had to leave Sungwoon on his own.

 

It took a few sessions for Sungwoon to feel comfortable with the arrangement; for his heart and mind to disassociate from one another. Once Daniel saw that he was starting to break down the elder’s walls he started inviting him to do other things. For example, accompanying him to the bookstore or running to the convenience store for a candy run before a study session. There were times when Daniel would follow Sungwoon into the practice rooms to watch him sing. Sungwoon allowed it because he genuinely thought it would be good for Daniel and help him with his class. Minhyun’s presence was never physically there but he was semi present at the forefront of Sungwoon’s mind. Sometimes he would catch himself daydreaming about the younger vocalist while Daniel sat right next to him.

 

The more Sungwoon let his guard down, the less studying they did, and the farther they slipped into their old habits. Sungwoon realized how easy it was to be friends with Daniel; how easy it was to fall for him back then. But every night he would return to Minhyun with an equally as satisfied smile and his heart could not compute where it truly lied. Sungwoon was healing. He was climbing out of the dark hole he’d been in for weeks. It was Jisung, however, that brought up a very intriguing yet worrying notion.

 

Was Sungwoon healing because of Minhyun or because he was spending time with Daniel again?

 

Sungwoon was almost positive it was Minhyun. Minhyun who was slowly but surely gaining Sungwoon’s love and affection. A part of him, a tiny part, the smallest voice in his head, did wonder though, if Daniel had something to do with it.

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

Habits were hard to break yet certainly easy to slip into. There were effortless habits like resting your head on a close friend’s shoulder or sharing meals without even asking. Things that came so easily with no worries. Then there were habits that were more problematic. Tendencies that were unstoppable in the moment due to the regularity of the situation.

 

“Oh my god, hyung! My stomach! That was way too funny.” Daniel gasped, catching his breath after laughing so hard.

 

“I can’t believe you still laugh at my voice cracking. It’s still that funny?” Sungwoon glanced at Daniel sideways and crossed his arms over his chest. The couch cushion in the empty student lounge groaned as Daniel settled into the seat again.

 

“It will never not be funny!” Daniel said leaning in with a teasing grin. “Oh, my phone is vibrating. Who can that- Oh shit! I have to go. Where’d the time go?” He whistled lowly as he caught the time. “Well, I’ll see you later, hyung. Thanks again.”  

 

Daniel ducked down, capturing Sungwoon’s face in his palms and pressed a short peck to his lips. The shock hit Sungwoon instantly whereas it came to Daniel seconds later when he was a few footsteps away. He whirled around with his hand hovering before his own lips and stared at Sungwoon with big, terrified eyes as Sungwoon returned the expression.

 

“H-hyung, I- uh,” Daniel stuttered. “I didn’t mean to-”

 

Sungwoon wiped the palms of his hands on his jeans and stood with a nervous laugh stumbling passed his lips. “It’s fine. It’s okay. Old habits die hard.”

 

_Old flames die harder._

 

 

**«« - »»**

Tossing his bag into their common area, Sungwoon pulled out a water from his bookbag and propped his feet on the coffee table. Jisung would be back from class soon and then they would head to the dining hall. With all the time he’d been splitting between Minhyun and Daniel he barely got to keep up with his best friend besides their usual banter.

 

Sungwoon wanted to tell Jisung how Daniel had kissed him but didn’t at the same time. It would force him to acknowledge something he should have stopped a long time ago. He was sure Jisung would be quick to tell him that too.

 

“Sungwoon?” Jisung stuck his head into the dorm. “Feet off the table, you vandal.”

 

Sungwoon smiled and rose to his feet, capping his water bottle. “Let’s go!”

 

There was pizza for dinner and they wasted no time slapping 4 slices each onto their plates and scurrying into the closest available seats to inhale them. They spent the first few minutes in relative silence. The only noise coming from their lips smacking together as they vivaciously devoured their pizza.

 

“Hyung,” Sungwoon started after finishing the second slice. “What happened with that girl? Did you ask her out finally?”

 

Jisung sighed into his pizza and wiped his mouth. “No.”

 

“Why not?” Sungwoon mumbled.

 

“She has a boyfriend.”

 

Sungwoon groaned compassionately. “That would have been nice to know from the start.”

 

Jisung shook his head and downed his Coke. “But she has a friend and we’re going on a double date next Friday.”

 

Sungwoon slammed his fist into the table and held it out for Jisung to pound. “Hell yeah.”

 

“How’s everything going with you?” Jisung asked, wiping his lips of excess grease and transitioning into the more interesting topic.

 

Sungwoon took a few short seconds to gather his thoughts; what he wanted to say versus what he should not say. “Uh,” He cleared his throat. “Everything is fine.”

 

Jisung caught the hesitation in his voice. “But?”

 

Sungwoon’s gaze briefly flitted up to his best friend’s. “But… Daniel,” He took a large bite of the pizza and mumbled over the large amount of cheese in his mouth. “Hekissedmebyaccident.”

 

Unfortunately, Jisung understood and his eyes popped open over his own slice of pizza that he was biting into. “ _What?_ ”

 

There was no other way to say it besides telling it straight. Sungwoon inhaled deeply and wiped the string of cheese that clung to his chin. “The other day, he kissed me. It was a goodbye peck. Nothing big.”

 

“Sungwoon, that’s still- what are you- did you tell Minhyun?”

 

“No.” Sungwoon looked down. “Why would I? It didn’t mean anything. Seriously it was just force of habit.”

 

He could feel Jisung’s condemning stare but Minhyun was texting him about going to the movies later so Sungwoon ignored it.

 

“You know,” Jisung started cautiously. “When I said it would be good for you to help Daniel maybe I was wrong. I can’t tell if you’re taking steps forward or backwards.”

 

Sungwoon chuckled, laughing it off to make himself feel better and overlook the reality. “Hyung,” He waved his phone showing off his chat with Minhyun.

 

“Okay,” Jisung shrugged. “Maybe you are moving on but Daniel seems to be…”

 

“What?”

 

But Sungwoon already knew what he was going to say.

 

Jisung shook his head. “You already know. Just be careful.”

 

Maybe Sungwoon would say it was days later when everything came to a head. Instead of heeding Jisung’s advice, he trudged on believing he knew what his game plan was and that everything would fix itself if he kept moving forward.

 

It was a simple community soccer game in the university sports field where a bunch of guys had gathered to have a scrimmage. Sungwoon had showed up with Minhyun, but Daniel had appeared on his other side as he always did because if Sungwoon was the sun, Daniel was every planet that orbited it.

 

They were instructed to choose their own teams to make up for some lost time and get the game going quicker so predictably, Daniel and Minhyun both grabbed for Sungwoon’s hands. There Sungwoon stood between his almost boyfriend and his ex-boyfriend and Jisung’s knowing stare; a mess that he could have prevented. Or could he?

 

Feeling the warmth from their hands and the negative energy radiating from their potent glares at each other, Sungwoon did what he had to do.

 

“Um,” He said pulling his hand away from Daniel’s grasp. “Sorry Daniel. I’m going to choose Minhyun’s team. Next time, alright?” He added to lessen the blow because really, Daniel and Sungwoon were always on the same team. It was strange to go against each other and that fact was clearly obvious just glancing at Daniel’s unpleasant expression.

 

Sungwoon was able to shake off the intermittent awkwardness, but he couldn’t say the same for the other two males who played the remainder of the game standoffish to not only one another but to Sungwoon too.

 

 

«« - »»

 

 

“Minhyun?”

 

“Yes, hyung?”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Minhyun looked up from his book inquisitively before leaving his bookmark inside and setting the novel onto the picnic bench. “For what?”

 

Sungwoon sighed, his shoulders dropping from his ears to a slouched position. He tilted his face to the fresh, open sky. “For finding me that night.” He smiled softly and turned to Minhyun. Minhyun broke into a kind smile and a faint blush spread across the apples of his cheeks. He slid in closer to the elder without breaking eye contact and slowly slid his gaze down to Sungwoon’s pink lips. Sungwoon’s lips parted slightly and then he closed them almost expectantly.

 

Minhyun looked directly into Sungwoon’s eyes and closed the distance between them.

 

Sungwoon could feel the nervousness radiating off the younger’s lips so he made sure to put in a little extra pressure to make him aware that he was enjoying it.

 

Minhyun backed away with a sigh and Sungwoon grinned at him. He felt so at peace with the world at that moment. He giggled at the other’s bashful expression. It was their first kiss and Minhyun was behaving ever so much like a timid teenager.

 

Sungwoon’s heart was warm.

 

 

**«« - »»**

 

 

It was days later when Daniel showed himself before Sungwoon again; bumping into each other in Daniel’s dorm one humid night.

 

“Hyung!” The younger called, spotting Sungwoon walking down his hallway. “What are you doing here?”

 

Sungwoon slowed his pace until he met Daniel in the middle of the hallway. “I was just hanging out with Jaehwan. I’m on my way out.”

 

“Nonsense! Come in and verse me in Mario Kart.”

 

Sungwoon checked the time on his phone and figured he had a little extra time before he had to meet up with Minhyun.

 

Giving into Daniel’s child-like excitement, he agreed. “Alright. Just for a little bit though.”

 

A lighthearted game of Mario Kart quickly turned into a competitive one and Sungwoon and Daniel found themselves leaning forward towards the screen, plotting ways to demolish each other.

 

“Don’t use the blue turtle! I said don’t!!” Daniel groaned and threw himself backwards onto the carpet while Sungwoon snickered.

 

Rounding the next dark corner of Ghost Valley, Sungwoon’s phone rang and with the tiniest of glances to the screen his entire face lit up.

 

“Hey,” He answered brightly, pausing the game. Daniel trained his eyes on him and sat up. “Yeah. I’ll be right there.” Tapping the end call button, Sungwoon pushed himself up, placing the controller on the couch.

 

“Whoa, where are you going?” Daniel watched his every move from the floor with furrowed brows.  

 

Sungwoon pulled up his pants a little and adjusted the cap on his head. “With Minhyun.” He said easily.

 

“You’re just going to leave me in the middle of the game just like that?”

 

Sungwoon looked to Daniel with a confused expression. “Uh. Yeah, sorry. He’s waiting for me.” He recognized the tone of Daniel’s voice and did not like where this was heading.

 

Daniel’s usually sunny disposition darkened and he rolled his eyes, shaking his head frustratedly. Sungwoon’s body tensed up watching the other’s behavior; his own annoyance building up.

 

“Daniel, I’m- We broke up.” Sungwoon clarified which was strange because Daniel had been the one to initiate it.

 

Daniel laughed sourly. “Yeah, I know. We’re just friends.”

 

Looking back on it, Sungwoon should have seen this coming. He caught all the signs but still feigned ignorance. “What are you trying to do, Daniel?”

 

Daniel sighed deeply and stood up. The controller in his right hand went flying into the couch. He moved closer to Sungwoon making him crane his neck to look up at him. In the past, Sungwoon found their height difference cute in a cliché way but now it did nothing but piss him off.  

 

“I don’t get why you always have to go running off to him when you’re with me. Am I that bad to be around?”

 

“First of all, it doesn’t matter who I’m with. If he needs me I go. Secon-”

 

“So what is he your boyfriend?” Daniel interjected.

 

Sungwoon narrowed his eyes and snapped. “And if he was? What’s it to you?”

 

Daniel was obviously put off by that answer; it showed in his face. His mouth open and shut trying to find a good enough comeback but Sungwoon cut him off.

 

“Daniel, I’m really not interested.”

 

“No, listen-” Daniel reached for Sungwoon’s arm but the older ripped it out of his grasp. “Just hear me out! I know I was the one who broke up with-”

 

“You can stop right there.” Sungwoon put up a hand and took a step back. “I said I’m not interested.”

 

Daniel moved a step forward. “Just listen to what I have to say!”

 

“I don’t want to!” Sungwoon yelled. All the anger he had set aside in hopes of burying the entire relationship resurfaced with a burning intensity. “What right do you think you have to demand that? You crushed me! You fucking crushed me, Daniel. You even had the audacity to ask me for advice with a new guy. It _killed_ me to pretend to be happy for you. You’re only doing this because I finally have someone else and you won’t see me moping around anymore.”

 

“That’s not true!”

 

“I don’t fucking care. I don’t want to hear anything you have to say.” Sungwoon was close to hysterics. Anymore and he would burst into angry tears and that’s what he didn’t want to do.

 

Daniel hung his head exasperated. “You don’t change. Unbelievable.”

 

“Don’t you have a boyfriend to bother? Leave me alone.” Sungwoon seethed through narrowed eyes and pushed passed Daniel.

 

“I regret it!” Sungwoon froze. “I regret breaking up. I regret hurting you. I messed up and I miss you.”

 

Sungwoon focused on the linoleum floor and tried to regulate his heartbeat. He should have just left after visiting Jaehwan. He should have said no when Daniel asked him for help.

 

_He should have. He should have. He should have._

 

“But it took all of this for you to realize.”

 

“Sungwoon…”

 

Sungwoon inhaled a shaky breath. “He put me back together again. I’m okay now. I can wake up in the morning and go to class. It doesn’t hurt as much seeing you anymore. I can breathe without feeling like I’m suffocating.” He half turned towards Daniel. “It’s too late.”

 

“We can try again.” The hopefulness in Daniel’s voice was stifling. “Hyung, I’ve learned from my mistake. Let’s start over.”

 

His footsteps were getting too close. “I don’t want to start over.” His steps came to a halt. “I only want him.”

 

_I don’t want you anymore._

From his peripheral, Sungwoon saw Daniel lower his head in defeat. Sungwoon knew how he felt. He understood what it was like to have the one you love say they love someone else.

 

“Hyung,” He called brokenly and closed the gap between them. Daniel raised his shaky hands to Sungwoon’s face ever so gently and thumbed at his heated cheeks. It brought back memories and feelings. Sungwoon didn’t want to but if this was the last time, he could muster enough courage to face him.

 

The sadness in Daniel’s eyes was unreal. If this was how Sungwoon had looked that night, how could Daniel have walked away?

 

“One last time,” Daniel whispered, voice barely there.

 

Even after facing heartbreak, Sungwoon was still prone to giving into Daniel. He closed his eyes silently.

 

Daniel kissed with the amount of love Sungwoon would have died for months ago. He kissed knowing he lost everything he ever wanted. He kissed with the earnestness of a man desperately asking for his last wish.

 

A last wish that Sungwoon could not honor.

 

Sungwoon’s hands came up to wrap around the bigger hands cupping his face and pried them away after holding them for the last time. The sensation of Daniel’s lips leaving his was a sadness he knew he would never forget. As painful as he knew it would be, he shook his head minutely, a lone teardrop running down his face and lifted his gaze. Daniel pressed his lips together as he stepped away from him and his eyes watered.

 

Sungwoon took an excruciating deep breath in the silence of the room feeling his heart about to give out.

 

“Goodbye Daniel.”

 

_There’s someone else that makes me happy now. Someone else will love you. Please, let me go._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted everyone to read this and be in pain but I don't think I accomplished it. I am eh about this story but I hope you guys liked it anyway :)
> 
> Also, if you're happy with the Hwangcloud ending, the story ends here.  
> If you want an alternate ending, proceed to the next part.


	2. Alternate Ending

Climbing up the stairs, Sungwoon questioned himself with every step he took. He clutched the strap of his book bag and paused in front of the door leading to the third floor.

 

It took him all of two days to make his decision but was he positive it was the right one? No. Was he certain he wouldn’t regret it? No. He wasn’t 100% about anything besides one thing.

 

Standing in front of Daniel’s door Sungwoon was angry. Angry at Daniel for ripping apart their happiness. Angry with himself for hurting Minhyun and going back to the person who caused him so much pain. Angry at the world for still wanting Daniel so much and feeling lost without him still when he thought he had gotten over it.

 

Sungwoon exhaled and confirmed his choice, rapping his knuckles on the door. It opened to a very tired looking Daniel who’s face fell in surprise when he saw the older. Sungwoon took in his under-eye circles and dropped his gaze. He shrugged his shoulders in defeat beneath the younger’s hopeful stare.

 

“It’s always been you.”

 

Daniel crushed Sungwoon to his body, kissing his head repeatedly, desperately. Breathing him in like the oxygen he needs to survive. “I didn’t know… what I was going to do without you.” Daniel whispered and Sungwoon leaned his forehead against Daniel’s shoulder.  

 

He wasn’t positive it was the right decision but he was at least positive that he loved him.

 

 

«« - »»

 

 

Love wasn’t always enough, though, was it?

 

“I hate this!”

 

They fought almost every day. Insecurities and contrasting opinions.

 

“No one is forcing you to be here!”

 

Sungwoon stared at Daniel hurt because how could he say that so freely and then angrily turned away; heavy footsteps carried him to the exit away from their mess. Daniel caught his arm and pulled him back, hugging him tight, instantly regretting what he yelled.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Don’t go.” Sungwoon didn’t return the hug and Daniel knew he was holding in all of his anger so he hugged him tighter and buried his face into his hair scrunching up his eyes. They stayed like that until Sungwoon’s resolve broke and he sighed brokenly.

 

“It’s not easy.”

 

“I know. I’m sorry.”

 

Sungwoon swallowed back his shakiness. “Saying sorry doesn’t fix anything.”

 

Daniel stayed nervously quiet.

 

“Maybe…”

 

“Don’t say it.” Daniel pulled away with panic in his eyes and looked directly into Sungwoon’s.

 

Sungwoon’s face started to crumple so he looked up blinking but tears slid out the corners of his eyes anyway. He turned away and covered his face not wanting to be seen so messed up and affected.

 

“I hurt you. And broke your trust, but I love you.” Daniel said. “Please don’t…”

 

“Your love hurts.” Sungwoon whispered, words tangled in his tears.

 

Daniel had never seen Sungwoon cry like this. Sungwoon had always been the strong one. The one to hold everything in and never let others know how terrible he was feeling. It ripped Daniel to shreds knowing he was the cause of Sungwoon’s pain. Even more so because he didn’t know if he could fix it.

 

Sungwoon crouched down, hands still covering his face. His shoulders shook with the shaky breaths he took trying to calm down. Eventually he locked himself in the bathroom, staying in the sanctity of the small room where he was free to think clearly with only the humming of the light above him. When he finally emerged, Daniel had a hand to the door, about to open it to check on him. Sungwoon appeared externally composed minus the puffy, red eyes. He walked to pick up his jacket while Daniel followed him from a few steps behind.

 

“I’m going to…” Sungwoon vaguely gestured to the door and Daniel panicked.

 

“No, wha- wait!”

 

Sungwoon cut him off and stared at Daniel’s shoes. “I’ll come back.” He said and sadly looked up at Daniel.

 

Daniel was relieved but still uneasy. He needed to give Sungwoon space. He wanted him to come back to him and the only way to do that was to let him go and wait for him to return.

 

 

«« - »»

 

 

The evening sun was bathing Daniel’s room in a wash of light when Sungwoon walked through the door. He was noticeably in a better mood although Daniel still occupied the couch with a video game controller in his hand and a distraught frown on his face. Daniel’s nerves shot up as Sungwoon sat down next to him on the couch. A feeling that the end was near loomed over him. He completed the current task he was working on in hopes that it would combat his stress before turning the game off and giving Sungwoon his full attention.

 

“I went to see Minhyun.” Sungwoon said as he played with the long sleeves of his t-shirt. Daniel could not mask the hurt. “He’s really great.” A small smile spread across Sungwoon’s lips and Daniel looked away. “As a friend.”

 

Sungwoon sighed and leaned back into the couch. He was aware of how spiteful he sounded. He knew what a sensitive topic Minhyun was to Daniel. He reached over and pulled Daniel’s hand into his lap. He weighed it, measured it against his own and traced the top of it with light strokes of his thumb. His solemn eyes roamed up to Daniel’s with hidden peace.

 

“Do you love me?”

 

Without hesitation, Daniel closed his fist around Sungwoon’s fingers. “More than anything else in the world.”

 

Sungwoon finally smiled at him and leaned in, resting his cheek on Daniel’s shoulder. Daniel made no move to hold him, just stared down the slope of his nose, to his rosy lips and sweater paws.

 

“Let’s make this work.” Sungwoon said softly and it was then that Daniel cradled the elder’s smaller face in his palms and raised it up to look at him adoringly. He tenderly kissed his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks and when Sungwoon thought his lips were next, Daniel kissed his nose.

 

“Let’s make this work.”


End file.
